How becoming "Jesus-y" isn't so lame

How do I begin without running half of you off?

The Cliff Notes version is I recently found a new church, dug it so much I couldn't get enough, got baptized and accepted Jesus as my one and only savior. The End. 

When I was younger my best friend and I would refer to anyone who started getting more involved with church as becoming Jesus-y.  Ex: "I just became Facebook friends with ____, I think she's all Jesus-y now" to which one or the other would respond "ohhhhhhh", as if they had contracted a horrible disease. So what exactly did we mean by Jesus-y? Boring, no fun, straight-laced, a dud, someone you had to walk on pins and needles with, and frankly someone we probably didn't want to hang out with that much aside from a casual group dinner where afterwards we would leave with all of the pleasantries and go get hammered. 

Back in the fall of 2014 my husband said "I think we should go back to church".  Our last church experience wasn't necessarily bad but it had somewhat run its course for us. That sounds bad. "It had run its course".  I don't mean that we treat our churches like old stagnant boyfriends that couldn't be bothered to do anything that didn't involve a remote control (no I'm not bitter) but we weren't overly involved and there was a change in everyone in from the top down and it just didn't feel right. So we quit going... boo hoo. 

He already had a church in mind based on a recommendation from a friend.  Not really a recommendation like you get for a plumber or a masseuse but he knew that his friend spoke highly of the church and the pastor had always been there for him when he needed him.  So we gave it a shot... 

Our first experience was like none we had ever experienced. Before I go on please note I'm not really here to necessarily be a church or a religion pusher but to tell my story about how it does not have to be perceived as being some sort of negative. We walked out of our first service, looked at each other and said "well that was different... and weird... wanna go back?".  Our pastor is not only a great pastor, he is one of the most amazing public speakers I have ever heard.  So if his engagement of my overworked, ADD, Ritalin past, brain is what got me hooked then so be it. For the first time in my life I LOOK FORWARD to going to church. I enjoy all of the events, the people, the praise the worship and most of all the relationship that I have built with God that I didn't have before. I was always a believer but I had only words and no actions.  

I have had what I consider to be the most miraculous change in my life EVER and while it has been extremely profound in many ways, the truth is, I am still the same ME I was before.  Now some may bawk at that because being baptized as an adult means that you are essentially giving up your old life, washing away your sins, and starting over, with a new dude in charge of handling your affairs.

I am still Kristen, still the same person who loves  yoga, working out, peanut butter and jelly, tikis (note: while I love them and collected them for years I have never worshiped them so calm down before your toss scripture about false idols at me!), the beach, Hawaii, would drink Sailor Jerry rum, Stella Artois, and Leffe if it had absolutely no alcohol effect because I LOVE and miss the taste of them all (another note, my lack of booze consumption has nothing to do with church, it has to do with my body hating hangovers and making a grown up decision)  cats, dogs, writing, teaching, kayaking, roller skating (when I can find someone brave enough to join me), my family, my kids, my house, my friends, and a giant list of other things that I loved before this change and will continue to love forever.  

I am not boring.  I am not going to suddenly start waving a bible and preaching hellfire and damnation to those who don't believe the same thing I do, I will not turn my back on those in need or whose believes or lifestyles may not be on par with mine as frankly we are all sinners so you can all jump on the bus and I'll drive.  When we get to our perspective destinations I'll hit the brakes accordingly. With that said if anyone has curiosity, intrigue or interest in taking this conversation a bit deeper by all means my door is open.  I will be happy to share exactly how this choice has changed my life and it has all be for the positive and the peaceful.  Period.

I'm a yoga instructor (just one of my hats) and while Yoga is not a religion, it does come from India which is steeped in Buddhism and Hinduism. I have students from all walks of life.  Buddhists, Atheists, Hinduists, Muslims, Christians and probably a host of others I am not aware of. These are my students and these are my friends.  When I teach my classes I tend to give visualizations and "words of wisdom" especially during Savasana (the yummy relaxation bit at the end).  While I won't quote scripture per say, I will pass on the messages that are universal and true to all in words that work for all.  I learned at a very young age in business to "know your audience".  The words I speak are this: Love thy neighbor.  Love and honor yourself but be sure to help those who are far less fortunate than you.  Be thankful for what you have and don't spend your life searching for things to covet.  Live in the present moment as you can't change the past and you sure as heck can't predict the future.  Practice love and peace in everything you do.  Be positive and release negativity.  I am not a theologist but in my limited religious knowledge I  imagine that somewhere and somehow that translates to all belief systems.  

One observation I have had is how people tend to fall in two categories:

A) Those who are fearful and uncomfortable talking about it (Christianity).  I've recently heard a lot of people say "I believe in God but I'm not really religious".  I suppose that was my previous place in life.

B) Those who sniff you out like two dogs circling each other for the first time and then once they realize you're "cool" they will openly tell you how amazing Jesus has been to them. It almost feels likes an underground culture that people don't want to expose too soon until they realize you are in the same camp.  Maybe we need a secret handshake?? Intriguing... 

My point is that making this change in my life doesn't make me lame, boring or a dud.  I am the same person I was before with a new EXTREMELY important relationship going on that has had a very profound impact on my life as well as my husbands. It is a blessing that we are taking this journey together, I kind of feel bad for calling my old friends Jesus-y but to be honest it makes me laugh because I am not always politically correct.  I won't apologize yet I can now say, "yeah as of last fall I got all Jesus-y too" and be extremely proud of it.  I do still have work to do because due to being "Jesus-y" there are some changes I would like to make on my own. I have had a dumpster mouth since I was a kid and it is a habit I am working on breaking.  I work in the sailing industry so throwing me in with those who "cuss like a sailor" isn't a good match, I fit in just a little too well.  My plan is to start serving others in a bigger capacity than I am now so I challenge anyone to find fault in that. Lastly I want to make a bigger impact on other peoples lives. I am happy with this change in my life and would love to help anyone else out there who is open and willing. I've met some of the most giving, trusting, helpful and amazing people at my church and am looking forward to getting to know many of them much better. 

To those of you who have been accepting of this I thank you graciously from the bottom of my heart, to those of you who have welcomed us in I do the same, and for those who have mocked, laughed and or ridiculed us... I pray for you... In Jesus-y name... Amen xo 

Battlestar Homeactica

When you are in a relationship, what makes or breaks it is the art of choosing your battles.

That isn't just about marriage but family, friendship, ex's, co-workers, business partners, legal battles, you name it.  When there is more than one person involved, there is opportunity for opposition.

When we are young we argue with people about some seriously, tiny and mundane things.  Things that in the big scheme of life, don't freaking matter.  Even in my late 20's my stubborn ass would fight to the end just to prove I was right over song lyrics!  Now with the internet at our fingertips we can quickly and easily prove someone wrong in a matter of nanoseconds.  See!? I TOLD you I was right!

As we age these things get bigger and more serious.  It is when we hit our 30's or so that we may (or sadly may not) realize that arguing for hours over something that really simply DOES NOT MATTER.  Are you willing to lose your friendship of 10 years becuase you can't agree over whether Sixteen Candles or The Breakfast Club was the better John Hughes movie? Or God forbid you toss alcohol in the mix you could lose your marriage over how he yelled at you that one time 15 years ago but you really just can't let it go. Move on... you can't change the past and you can't predict the future.  

I've watched families literally rip apart because one person simply cannot and will not EVER EVER EVER admit that they are wrong. It's terribly sad, terrilby tragic, and terribly stupid. 

As I have personally found a renewed faith in God ove the past 6-8 months, one thing that has reallly come to my heart is that you simply have to pick your battles.  With that said, part of that is knowing that there are instances when you will never ever win, not because you are wrong, but because you are fighting or bickering with a force that will never allow themselves to be reckoned with.  You have to ask yourself, "is arguing over a/b/c really worth all of the stress and the negative energy?".  Toss it into God's hand and let Him deal with it.  

In this world of social media it is WAY too easy to get into an overheated bullshit battle with a complete stranger becuase they have either misread or misunderstood your words or because they are completely distraught witih the fact that you might actually reallly like Miley Cyrus and they are going to condemn you to hell because of it.  Really? No thank you, I have a positive life to live.  Moving on....

Being in a marriage with another strong hardhead has proven to be a challenge but after a few years and some good communication we both realize that we can't both always be right.  At the right time and right place, someone usually backs down.  I'd love to say I'm always right but I have learned with experience that you are a far more intelligent person when you can admit mistake and defeat.  

So as you go forth today and this week think about choosing your words wisely because when they get ugly you can't take them back ... and an apology is only 2nd best to not saying them at all.  

Pick your battles carefully and look deep into the root of what your battle is about and how important it really is to your day to day life.  If it is about something that genuinely affects your relationship or household then maybe it is worth the fight but if it is about whether Nicki Minaj is sexy or not or should Madonna really be dancing around at 56?... Move on.  

Life is short, enjoy your days with abundance xo